Dreams of gathering...things

Why dream of mustard seed flour? Does such a flour even exist? I was searching for it and found sacks, the size of small Hecker's bags that had to be lifted and taken. But then a 4 footed long haired pussycat came caterwauling because it was 4:40am and he felt it was time to eat his breakfast.

Very strange how I've baked all my life and lately anything I bake is leaden, as to be inedible, tasteless. As the adage goes the quality of the cholent reflects the guests who will eat it, must be for baked goods as well. Or maybe this is why menstruating women are forbidden to bake challah or make their husbands beds or hand their husbands anything, hand to hand...and I'm sure a host of other dainties I've missed. I remember going to a kallah class in Crown Heights with a bevy of brides-to-be gathered at the feet of this particular rebbitzen (self annointed) and said rebbetizin was whispering so low that anyone not sitting 6" from her slippers couldnt hear a word. So it could be why I'm not fully versed on Niddah laws and their effects on baked goods.

I followed Ina Garten's recipe for Irish Soda Bread and it could be used as a door stop. Thinking that baking soda may not have been fresh enough since that's the only leavening used for 4 cups of flour. And then the best Gingersnaps in the world, a recipe from Paula Deen, came out way too overdone when they should have been chewy. I sent MD brownies for his birthday and even he asked, WTF Ma? or maybe it was something more polite but I asked myself that very question.

Could be the jinn IBSinger writes about, those unseen entities that come around to cause problems when you least need them. They come of their own accord and when you need a lesson taught...and then the souffle falls flat or you twist your ankle on a cat toy you looked at 50x on the rug as you walked past it. Or maybe the mezuzah needs a check?

What kind of Judaism is this that is a hodge podge of Beatrix Potter's anthropomorphized animals speaking, jinnies messing the challah dough, bits and tatters of law, minhaggim, rumor and assumptions?

I was married to my children's father who shaved my head every once in a while...seems tznius according to some in Chabad meant 1" of hair for women as well. But then you can purchase a sheitl of human hair that goes down your back and you look as lovely as if you had hair. I knew women, the older rebbetzins who came to Brooklyn from Russia, Hungary and Poland. They had the front row in the women's section in the old 770. They always wore sheitlach but not for beauty, in fact it appeared those were the last of the horse hair models, combed and shaped once and plopped on like a hat, a middle part, no bangs, functionary...serious and the style went well with the no makeup look and a pair of small pearl earrings.

So when the Rebbe speaks of women obligated to wear a sheitl, its unlikely he meant 24" hair pieces taken from the heads of Indian or Chinese idolators. No matter what kind of scarf I wear, Israeli w fringe or silver threads, plain cotton triangles, tied up or down, I look like a wash woman. I recently bought a sheitl in NYC and the woman showed me there is actually a remedy invented for slipping scarves and wigs. Its a small cap, like a stocking that you slip over your head and the sheitl behaves itself for hours. Like you didnt know that....

So its shabbos Shemot...I read w tissues this last weeks about Avraham missing his son...I lost Josef, take Benjamin and you might as well dig my grave. Now everyone gets to leave (hence ComingHome B"H), lock stock and whatever isnt nailed down. Its not Pesach that I look around and ask when golus ends...its reading parsha Shemot.